Right now I am feeling like a failure as a wife. Jason is having a bad day. It is so hard to see the man who is always MY rock falling like he is. He was the most amazing daddy. If you were able to witness him and Eli together, you know what I'm talking about. They both would light up when they were together. I went through a rough spell with PPD right after giving birth, so Jason did so much almost by himself for a little while. They definitely had a very special bond that many men never have with their child no matter how much time they have with them. It made me fall more in love with both of them. Jason could make Eli giggle and smile... I couldn't wait for him to get home from work sometimes so that I could hear that little giggle. So many men I know leave the child-raising to the women, but not Jason. He was hands-on from the beginning, like being a daddy was what he was put here to do. I don't know any words that I can say to comfort him, but I know, I understand why he can't get out of bed. There are no words. Nothing can fill the void. Nothing can bring back the giggles and the smiles. It is just easier to avoid and sleep.